Living with Depression, Mania, and Medication Essay -- Personal Narrat

Living with Depression, Mania, and Medication Depression joined my life shortly after I entered middle school and tagged on persistently through my adolescent years. At first, my sullen moods were brushed off as mere hormonal changes, but I quickly became aware there was something more behind them. The severity of depression is difficult to explain without personal thoughts and examples. I know that my depression is coming long before it sets in. There is a cloud of forewarning that starts to move in on the vibrancy of my thoughts and vision; the world becomes distorted and negative. Slowly, this bleakness moves in from the outside world down to the pit of my stomach where it creates a dark, menacing feeling that makes me want to cry, scream, and vomit all at the same time. The feeling beckons me to a state of hopelessness and complete despair. Lingering thoughts of paranoia become prominent which leaves friends as foes out to abandon me and complete strangers as agents out to destroy me. The thoughts of negativity drag me deepe r and deeper until I am convinced there is no bottom; they separate me from the outside world. It is in this lowest state that one of two things happens: either I am persuaded by suicidal tendencies or the blackness lifts without a trace. Without medication, death was always a daunting possibility of ending this horrid affair. The cycling of depression became a constant part of my life leaving me always afraid of what was around the corner. The other side of that corner did not appear in my life until the end of high school. Around the time of my eighteenth birthday, my mania began its cycle. The brutality of mania may set in as mere normalcy, but, in time, that same "normalcy" can end worse than d... ...nia, and medication are all part of the bipolar disorder that will be with me for the rest of my life. The cruelty of depression and ruthlessness of mania are something that no person should have to bear. They force a person to doubt society, reject friends, and lose sanity while the disease slowly starts killing the victim from the inside out. However difficult my past has been made by depression and mania, my life has come to look brighter with the advancement of medication. Bipolar disorder is a life- long disease that will always have its setbacks; however, it is a disease that, with the proper medication, will not keep me locked in a cage separate from the outside world. With the diagnoses of bipolarity, I know that I will have to deal with depression and mania, but I also know that I was not born crazy. I was born with a disease, but I was meant to live as me. Living with Depression, Mania, and Medication Essay -- Personal Narrat Living with Depression, Mania, and Medication Depression joined my life shortly after I entered middle school and tagged on persistently through my adolescent years. At first, my sullen moods were brushed off as mere hormonal changes, but I quickly became aware there was something more behind them. The severity of depression is difficult to explain without personal thoughts and examples. I know that my depression is coming long before it sets in. There is a cloud of forewarning that starts to move in on the vibrancy of my thoughts and vision; the world becomes distorted and negative. Slowly, this bleakness moves in from the outside world down to the pit of my stomach where it creates a dark, menacing feeling that makes me want to cry, scream, and vomit all at the same time. The feeling beckons me to a state of hopelessness and complete despair. Lingering thoughts of paranoia become prominent which leaves friends as foes out to abandon me and complete strangers as agents out to destroy me. The thoughts of negativity drag me deepe r and deeper until I am convinced there is no bottom; they separate me from the outside world. It is in this lowest state that one of two things happens: either I am persuaded by suicidal tendencies or the blackness lifts without a trace. Without medication, death was always a daunting possibility of ending this horrid affair. The cycling of depression became a constant part of my life leaving me always afraid of what was around the corner. The other side of that corner did not appear in my life until the end of high school. Around the time of my eighteenth birthday, my mania began its cycle. The brutality of mania may set in as mere normalcy, but, in time, that same "normalcy" can end worse than d... ...nia, and medication are all part of the bipolar disorder that will be with me for the rest of my life. The cruelty of depression and ruthlessness of mania are something that no person should have to bear. They force a person to doubt society, reject friends, and lose sanity while the disease slowly starts killing the victim from the inside out. However difficult my past has been made by depression and mania, my life has come to look brighter with the advancement of medication. Bipolar disorder is a life- long disease that will always have its setbacks; however, it is a disease that, with the proper medication, will not keep me locked in a cage separate from the outside world. With the diagnoses of bipolarity, I know that I will have to deal with depression and mania, but I also know that I was not born crazy. I was born with a disease, but I was meant to live as me.